Scary
by lewdness
Summary: How were they supposed to know that the door was a dud? [Monsters Inc. crossover] [oneshot, RikuSoraKairi friendship] [Crack!Drabble]


**Title: Scary****  
****Rating: K****  
****Pairings, if any: nooone. RikuSoraKairi friendship****  
****Summary: How were they supposed to know that the door was a dud? Monsters Inc. crossover oneshot, RikuSoraKairi friendship****  
****Word Count: 934**

**Disclaimer: not mine. Monsters Inc. Kingdom Hearts, or the knock-knock joke. Woe.****  
****Warnings: Hi, I'm clearly smoking crack.****  
****A/N**: No angst again. Weiiird. Monsters Inc. was such a cute movie though and it was begging to be written.

--

Two years of being required to wake up at the slightest sound had carried on for another year, making for more than a few restless nights. Three people in the same house meant that someone was bound to get up in the middle of the night, be it to get a drink or use the restroom. Some of the floorboards creaked and a door opening would make either of the boys (and sometimes even Kairi herself) wake up.

Sora was sleeping peacefully until something in the closet clicked and _moved, _the sound of metal and a body moving in the closet waking him. Nothing in his closet should be moving. Nothing in the closet should be able to open the door but regardless of what _should_ be happening, something _ was _ and Sora only waited, watching the door from under barely opened eyes, keeping his breathing slow and even as if he were still asleep. The door opened and a large, hulking figure stepped through, casting a shadow a mile long.

Tensing, Sora's fingers curled slightly around the warm energy of the Keyblade that was always waiting to be summoned at any moment. An attack was what he expected even though the battles they had fought were long over. What he got was the lights being turned on and a huge, fluffy, purple…thing with no less than nine eyes staring at him with a huge grin. "…What the-"

"Knock knock!" the thing chirped cheerfully, juggling some multicolored balls as he spoke.

"…_what?_" Sora sat up straight, the Keyblade forgotten as he stared and tried to figure out what was going on.

Nine eyes stared back as if not comprehending why the brunet wasn't asking the obvious question when prompted with a knock-knock joke. "We'll pretend like you said 'who's there'," the thing sighed, then continued. "Norma Lee!"

Mouth working but no words coming out, Sora scrubbed at his eyes, trying to determine if this was some kind of a joke or if this was actually happening. "Am I dreaming?" he asked slowly, not really expecting the thing to answer. A pinch to his arm only proved that it wasn't a dream and that there really was a furry creature standing in his room, juggling colorful balls and smiling at him.

"You're not very good at this," it stated solemnly, cheering instantly and shrugging his shoulders broadly. "We'll pretend that you said 'Norma Lee who?' So, I say, Normalee I don't go around knocking on doors, but do you want to buy a set of encyclopedias?"

Had he ate something weird during the night? That must be it. Was the ice cream that Kairi got somehow poisoned? "You're not a Heartless," Sora stated slowly, pushing back the blankets. "What are you?"

Before the thing could answer, the actual door leading from the hall to Sora's room, opened, revealing the sleep tousled forms of both Kairi and Riku. The thing jumped in surprise, the balls scattering across the floor with soft thumps. There was a moment of dead silence, broken by Kairi's soft snickers at seeing Sora's boxers- the ones she and Riku had given him as a joke one year ago for his birthday. Riku ran a hand through his hair, blinking sleepily as he tried to figure out what was going on. "…did we all eat something weird last night or is there really a…" he frowned, blinking again, trying to think of what it could or couldn't be. "S'not a Heartless, right?"

"Hey! You two aren't kids!" the thing said in shock, placing its arms on its hips.

Silence once more before the brunet realized what was being implied. "Hey! Neither am I!" Sora interrupted indignantly, his tone of voice clearly showing how insulted he was.

The monster sighed heavily, pressing one paw to his eyes, pinching the bridge of its nose- something they had all seen Leon do frequently though it was much more disturbing on a purple ball of fur. "I _told_ them that this door was a total dud, but no, they wouldn't listen to me," he muttered, turning around without another word and walking back into the closet, shutting the door behind him.

Silence reigned again as they all stared at the door, only broken when Kairi began to snicker quietly. "S-Sora, awesome…boxers…" she giggled, full-out laughter escaping her when the brunet flushed with embarrassment, scrambling for the sheet and holding it to him as if he were naked and trying to protect his virtue. "This is so bizarre. This stuff only happens to you, Sora, you know that right?"

Riku couldn't help the smirk that curled his own lips at the pink tinge to Sora's cheeks as he met their eyes with a scowl. "They bring out the color in your eyes, kiddo," he drawled, fingers running through his hair again, wincing as a knot pulled uncomfortably.

"Not funny you two." Sora began, stepping forward only to trip and fall over the small balls the thing had dropped. Stomach turning, he found himself falling backward with an ungraceful thud and yelp of shock, sprawled on his back with the sheet tangled around him.

Both Kairi and Riku were laughing openly now, the girl clinging to his arm as she tried to stay standing up, both ignoring how Sora was throwing the balls at them in retaliation, only increasing their amusement.

--

"Good job, Stu!" a blue-green monster congratulated, taking the three filled tanks of laughter. "Even if they weren't all kids- we'll scrap the door but apparently you're good with teens _and_ kids!"

Murrrr. Not beta'd since I just wanted to get this up. Any glaring errors are my fault and if you notice anything that doesn't flow right, let me know and I'll fix it. If you guys are interested in reading more of my stuff, things that won't be posted here or whatever, check out my writing LJ- the link is in my profile.

C&C is loved.


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